While Remus appeared to be rather drinking the water than letting it run outside over his body, Severus sat on his old desk, up in his old small room like he had done so many times before he had fled to Rügen. Meanwhile the sky had almost cleared up and a beautiful sunset was about to begin its wondrous play across the identical roofs. Nothing had changed.
But of course, everything had changed since he had said goodbye to Lily down in the street, not telling her that she wouldn’t be seeing him on the next day, or probably ever again. But there was at least some luck, some light, and it was this light’s fault that he had a wonderful, brave son who now was somewhere out there, trying to save the world from inside a tent that travelled with him and his best friends, probably having washed his hair on the same day, causing it to stand in various directions as though he had been greeted with one of the Weasley twins’ Shock Shakes.
“Severus?”, he had found him in his tight asylum, but Severus didn’t turn yet. “Damn it – it’s been quite a time since I’ve seen your hair like that. Wait – do you – do you wear – ”, Severus spun his entire body in his cross-legged posture.
“Yes?”
“Red?”, Remus aspirated.
“Do you mind?”
“Oh – no, no.”, the Werewolf blinked when Severus slid off the desk.
“Did you clean the tiles?”
“I did. Magically, if you don’t mind.”
“I don’t.”
“Er – what are you – ”
Severus had pulled his wand and the moist towel in Remus’ hand left him, coming to float in the middle of the tight room where a gush of water soaked it. It wrenched itself, but the dripping liquid became a smooth ball shortly below. That soared out and vanished down the toilet next door while the towel was spread in midair again, drying quickly under a stream of hot air. Done, Severus summoned both towels, stored them in his pouch he had carried openly on his chest and let it vanish then.
“That was quite impressive,”
“Don’t make me laugh.”, Severus snorted. “It was minor magic,”
“But it – ”
“If you hope you can charm me into your arms, you’re just slightly hoping in vain.”, he stepped closer and, though unsure whether it was wise, gently laid his hand on Remus’ right cheek. “I told you, often enough, I think.”
“But – ”
“Stop moaning – Moon Pup.”, Remus gulped. “You love her. She’s about to give birth to your child.”, he meant to protest, but Severus had no intention listening to that again. “No, you listen closely. You have responsibility now. Don’t be such a fool and let your child grow up without love. The first few weeks are the most important in a child’s development. You don’t want to be one of those guys who impregnate a woman and then drop her alone with it all.”
“Why do you even care. It’s not your child. What do you know about parentage anyway.”
“Believe me, I know more about it than you prefer. If you dump your child in that world now,”, Severus couldn’t prevent his quiet voice from starting to tremor.
“It won’t be alone – ”
“I said, listen. If you dump your child now, you will regret it until you take your last breath.”, blowing out one alike, he lightly shook his head and, biting his lip, let go of Remus’ face to turn away. “If I was to talk about it, I could give you two grand examp– ”, shocked, he stared back at the other man – Remus had grabbed the pouch around his neck for keeping him in place.
“I can’t – what if – ”
“Don’t start with that again,”, he took Remus’ hand, loosening his grip, which resulted in the palm lying flat against his heart, but he didn’t bother. “If that is the case, it is crucial that you don’t leave her alone with the child.”
“But she can’t look after two – ”, Severus’ left hand was back on Remus’ cheek.
“You know as much as I do, that Lycanthropy cannot be inherited. The child will not be a Werewolf.”
“But all the signs – ”
“But, but, but – I’ll bet my bum on that.”
“Er – ”
“If your child turns at the first full moon, you may lay me as often as you like to.”
“Really?”
“Remus!”, Severus hissed, actually upset about the sudden glistening in his eyes and squeezed his shoulder instead. “For once be a wise man and decide for your child!”
“Alright, I get it, you’re selfless enough to not want anyone being trust with a fate like yours.”, Severus only glared at him. “Look, Lily told me about your fath– what was that?”, he frowned.
“What was what.”, Severus huffed coldly and dropped both hands, though Remus’ left remained on his chest.
“That – did it just – ”
“Did what just what.”
“It jumped!”
“Would you mind speaking in whole sentences?”
“Your heart! It – it jumped!”
“Don’t be ridiculous.”
“No – it jumped – clearly – when – when I said – that Lily – ”, Remus gasped. “There! Oh goodness, no.”, he aspirated, staring straight into Severus’ eyes, who tried to keep them as blank as possible. “You don’t – oh my god – oh come on, it doesn’t help that you turn your face into an emotionless wall, I clearly felt it! Twice! You – you really love her! You – really – still – love her – ”
He indeed felt his heart pounding wildly against Remus’ flat hand, being enough for him to know he didn’t stand a chance if he couldn’t get his feet to move. Even worse, the other grabbed his shoulder now, just as if Remus knew that he fought for the urge to storm away.
“And?”, Severus breathed, as depleted as if a battle laid behind him, and actually it did. “You still have feelings for me too; even bigger than then.”
“How could you – ”, whispered Remus sadly, his lips trembling. “How could you – and – and Hermione?”
“What about her.”, there was a long pause in which Remus only stared at him, and strangely, he couldn’t stop himself from staring back.
“She worshipped him – if you still love her that much, after so many years – how could you have possibly killed Albus – goodness – if Harry knew that you – what was that?”, this time, Severus said nothing; he had felt it too – and could downright see the puzzle setting itself together behind Remus’ eyes and he shook his head wildly, at last backing away. “No. No! Not possible!”, though the bridge between their eyes remained, even when Remus lowered his head, brushing his hand over his moustache on the shocking discovery. “No, that can’t be. I mean, you were just destroyed – you – I thought, you had – needed something living to hold on – and the fact that he’s her son made – no – I mean – but he – he looks – so much – like – ”
Severus carefully wiped his long hair behind his ears, but brushed up the few shorter bundles, emphasising the natural habit of the thick waves, then took his reading glasses from his pocket and put them on. With a slack smile, he lightly pushed the tip of his nose from below. Then the smile grew into a smirk, which however didn’t lose its sadness with the increase of the arrogant expression. Remus trailed all his fingers through his already very greying brown hair. Severus let go of his nose.
“Now, wha’ did Lily tell ye ’bou’ me father? She told ye tha opinion o’ a nine-year-ol’, who’d stuck wit’ ’is opinion fer a lon’, lon’ time. Ye wan’ ter know why me father started drinkin’ again? Why ’e bea’ me mother? Why ’e treated me like mud? ’Cause she’d made ’im agree! ’Ey’d ’ardly enough ter feed ’emselves, an’ ’en two children? If it ’adn’ been fer ’er h’ar’, she’d ’ve given us both away.”
Away, that was where Remus turned. Hardly able to walk, he shuffled over to the bed, where he sank down with his face in hands.
“An’ we both fell in love wit’ one an’ tha same girl, who turned ou’ ter love us equally before she even knew we were brothers – twins, ter be precise. She din’ care, whom she would ’ave a child wit’. We were both ’er family, an’ she was ours – mine especially, after Mum died. An’ ’en James’ adoptive paren’s were carried off be Dragon Pox. Lily was ’ere fer us, in any way she could, ’cause it din’ matter ter ’er, no’ tha’ she was married ter one o’ us already. ’Twas nature at las’, tha’ decided.”
“And – we all – thought it – was a – ”
“Miracle? Well, I tell ye sum’thin’.”, Severus fiercely slipped his glasses back into the pocked, stomped over and sat down by Remus’ left. “Harry is still a miracle. An’ I am no’ talkin’ ’bou’ ’is fate; ’e is my lil miracle – an’ I ’ave ter pay tha full price fer me determinedness ter make an end ter Tom Riddle’s life. She made me swear, tha’ I would no’ brin’ Harry close ter me dangerous life, bu’ protec’ ’im as much as I can. I tried – hard – ter be a father – wit’ou’ makin’ ’im notice – I tried so ’ard ter bea’ me flaws ’e inherited, ou’ o’ ’im – an’ – an’ I think I did qui’e a good job. Ye know ’is attitude towards life,”, Remus gazed up at him, as much in tears as he was now. “I ’ave done me bes’ ter make ’im a better person than I am. An’ look wha’ ’e is.”
For a very long while, they only remained sitting on Severus’ old bed, which just fitted into the room, ever since his mother had found herself forced to enlarge it for matching his size. Lastly their tears were dried, and Severus raised, walking over to the desk by the window. He stored the pouch, bound his hair together with three rubber bands at once, picked up the Volto Mask that still laid there with Remus’ curious stare fixated at him, and put it on. Now a red hood covered the rest of his head neatly and he held out his hand for Remus to take it.
“What the f– ”
“You cannot Apparate us directly to the house. And once inside the shield, I would have to make us visible again. It is quite likely that they will attack me if I should confront them with myself openly. But I won’t let you go alone either. You would have to create an immense lie about where you have been gone for so long or how you received notice of Ted’s death. Not imaginable if you actually had to use this place as a refuge. Do yourself a favour and be honest to your wife. Especially now. She needs trustworthy people around.”
“Alright,”
Convinced, Remus got up as well, stepped forward, took his hand and they were gone with a careless crack, appearing with the same in a group of trees by the stream. They crossed the small bridge under the orange and blue sky of dusk, towards a small meadow that seemed to host no visible housing. But then Remus pulled him past the Fidelius Charm and the house appeared out of nowhere. Lights were shining from inside already and Andromeda, her wand held out, had opened the front door at the notice of an arrival.
“Sorry, I’m late. I got held up.”
“Identification!”, she yelled.
“Oh – damn it, forgot. I am Remus John Lupin, bitten by the Werewolf Fenrir Greyback when I was a child and I have insisted on starting that crap with the identification.”
“And who’s that?”, Tonks had squeezed herself past her mother who had lowered her wand right when she had raised hers, both without noticing the fact.
“It’s fine.”, they let go of each other’s hands and walked closer. “It’s a friend. You’d be totally shocked, but there’s really nothing you need to fear. Didn’t believe it first either, he saved me from quite a number of Death – Eaters – ”
Tonks had been faster. Her big, with pink cotton covered belly matching the colour of her short hair, she tripped down the two stairs, but immediately composed herself, stomped forward over the grass before either of them could decide how to react, seized the mask from below with her free hand and quickly tore it up and backwards off his head along with the hood.
“Ow! You do realise that I can’t shrink my nose like you, do you?”, he moaned when she gasped, and rubbed said part of his face.
“You!”, her head rushed between the two men.
“It’s fine, Dora. He’s on our side, really.”
“You!”, she shrieked louder.
“Yes, I.”, Severus rolled his eyes.
“You saved him from Death Eaters?”
“He did.”, Remus confirmed, and was as stunned as Severus when she flung her arms around his neck and hung on him as close as her belly would allow her to.
“Thank you.”, Tonks aspirated when Severus carefully patted her back. “If I can do anything in return – ”
“You could let go of me and give me back my mask. It was a present.”
“Oh – sure – ”, she snickered, hopped backwards and he gladly took the mask from her. “Is that a real one?”
“It is not a conjured mask that will disappear when I die, if you mean that.”
“No, I – I mean, a real one from Italy?”
“Yes, it is real, bought; or so I hope; in Venice by my best friend.”
“You got a best friend?”, she chuckled catching herself a malevolent glare. “Sorry. So? You’re on our side? Dirk’s got it all right then? He kept trying to tell everyone that there’s something strange about you supposedly having killed Dumbledore. Seems, he’s grown rather fond of you for using his body, hasn’t he?”
“He has done that?”
“Yeah. Until he went on the run because they wanted him for being Muggle-Born. Never heard of him since. Hope, he’s doing well. But sure he is.”, he and Remus exchanged a quick glance she didn’t catch. “Come on in!”, she waved them when she started walking. “Mum’s made supper. Oh don’t give me that look. We’ll stuff our faces and you can tell us all the truth ’bout what’s really happened between you and old Dumby that you had to send him across the fence.”
“She’s practically in a constant cheer,”, Remus commented her lively voice in a whisper. “If she doesn’t try to tear me apart.”
“I am quite familiar with the idiosyncrasies of a pregnant woman,”, Severus mumbled back as they followed her. “The question is, whether we should actually tell them. Personally; though I have asked you to be honest; have grown an aversion to crashing parties, especially in times each smile is like replacing one of the Seven Wonders. I would say, you wait until the child is born.”
“No. There’s a broadcast of Potterwatch tonight.”
“I know.”
“You know? You’re following it?”
“Not directly. That would be dangerous. But I know someone who does and reports every detail to me. Ironically, today’s password will be `Albus´, in case you didn’t catch it.”
“Well, then you’ll have to understand. I have to send the message out. It just wouldn’t do them justice. Especially since it’d be relayed from here.”
“What?”, Severus hissed and Remus closed the door.
“Yes.”
“What’s that chat you’re having there?”, Tonks sang across the friendly lit living room when she had been thrown out of the kitchen by her mother.
“Nothing.”, they grumbled at once.
“Uuuuuh. Man-to-man talk. Mind if I’d disturb?”, she grinned, but Severus found her general flashing appearance disturbing enough anyway.
“Not at all.”, he smirked and pushed Remus down onto a chair next to her at the laid table.
“What’re you doing? Oh no, keep out of there! That’s her empire. Sharp dog inside.”
“I’ve been screwed by a Werewolf once. There’s nothing that can scare me away anymore.”
“Er – how’s he meaning that?”, Tonks chuckled and Remus robbed one of his longs scars to cover up his blush.
“Take it as you like it.”, Severus sang and disappeared in the kitchen, where he came just in time to snatch a dishtowel and hold it under the heavy terrine Andromeda had nearly dropped.
“Oh my goodness, thank you. I forgot how heavy it was. And I’ve been only minutes out of the kitchen.”, he carried it out for her and she got additional dishes for him. “I hope, you will find something to your liking. Nymphadora has become almost like Remus in terms of meal preferences. I wonder, whether it is the child. Because that is what Remus fears most, you see? But on the other hand, when I carried her, I had to behave a lot as well and gained about twenty pounds. I still push half of it ahead.”, she sighed. “What would you like to drink?”
“I’ll take myself a glass of water, if I may.”
“Of course you may. They are – up there, yes. Oh I forgot, you have been here before.”
“Yes. Some time passed, but I still have a fairly good memory.”
Severus smiled and helped himself to his plain drink when she brought the rest of the supper to the table. They sat down together then, but Andromeda stopped her daughter from digging in.
“Oh Mum – can’t you leave it for once?”
“No, I insist.”
“What is this about?”, Severus asked.
“Mum’s gone paranoid. She wants to speak a prayer at each meal. At least she skips breakfast.”
“You should let your mother do then.”
“It’s so killing the spirit,”
“If a prayer gives her strength, you will have to let her do, unless you want to lose her to insanity.”
“She’s already gone insane.”, Tonks muttered under her breath.
“Thank you, Severus.”, Andromeda sighed, pretending not to have heard the add; they folded their hands. “Saints of God, come to our loved and befriended ones’ aid. Come to meet them oh all you angels. Receive their souls and present them to God the Most High. Amen.”
“Amen.”, the other three repeated, but Severus being the only one apart from her to make the sign of the cross, and having realised by Tonks’ glances that she normally must be speaking other kinds of prayers.
“I had no idea you were that religious,”, Remus meant as they started filling their plates.
“Usually I am not, although I was raised with the traditions of both Christians and Celts – which had probably been one of my big advantages in my History exams. But at times it just helps praying to something that has no exact proof of existence. Because maybe there is someone on the way to catch it up. I do however believe that some sort of – ah – angels exist. I do believe that death is not the end and that we will all meet again at a certain point in time. Whether we recognise one another for whom we had been, is anyone’s guess. I do not fear death, not at all. There are enough people I would like to see again. But I will nevertheless take care that as many good souls as possible are granted a secure future before I leave.”
“New I nou wad Mad-Eye meand.”, Tonks munched. “Alwaysh in for a shurprishe you are.”
~~#~~
Leaving had been no pleasure. But staying had been the same. So he had gone, before the others had arrived for the broadcast. Though a horrible thought slid into his mind when he sat at that table in the cellar – unrolled itself like Nagini when she was ready to serve her master, ready to strike for death to come. His death.
“’T’s me faul’.”, he muttered, his heavy head resting on his palm, while the other hand was held fatherly by Aberforth’s.
“It’s not your fault.”
“Everyone who knows tha truth ’bou’ me dies. I’m no’ ter tell anyone anymore – ”
“Codswallop.”
“No.”
“Really, that’s something absolutely absurd to say, boy. There’s quite a big deal of people who know and live on.”
“Tha war’s no’ over ye’.”
“Don’t drive yourself mad with rubbish, because that’s what it is. Complete rubbish. You should listen to yourself.”
“Well, I do!”, Severus moaned.
“Then tell me, what do you hear there, eh? Stupid is it. And it makes you sick. Don’t sicken yourself with idiotic theories. I know, you’ve lost another friend, but so have I. Do I look like I’m cursing myself?”
“Tha’s ’cause ye dun’ ’ave any reason ter curse yerself.”
“Exactly. Nor have you. It’s that Snatcher’s fault. Not yours, not mine, not his, even though he’s commanding ’em. It was that one Snatcher who murdered him consciously, without hesitation probably, and if that is so, he’s the only one to blame. Go to bed, Severus. Take some Sleeping Potion, if necessary. You need to rest. You need to be strong for what’s to come.”
“An’ wha’s ter come? Nuthin’ I ’aven’ ’ad fer me entire life – ”
“I know you don’t deserve that,”, Aberforth lightly shook his head, and Severus saw this big resemblance he probably wasn’t even aware of himself, “But some of us are weighted with a burden even a hundred of others wouldn’t be able to carry together. You say yourself that everything’s got a reason, in the end. They won’t have died for nothing. And if I have to go out there and slay every single Snatcher for the chance of getting the one who’s killed Dirk or Ted.”, a hollow chuckle escaped Severus. “Listen, boy. You still got friends. You’re not alone. You don’t need to fight this monster on your own. Don’t be the same fool as Harry was.”, at last, his head fully raised, leaving his palm empty, but his eyes still glistening with tears as salty as the sea of devastation that had caused them. “He too believed he was to do that alone, but had to learn to having gotten it all wrong. He’s not alone out there either. If he was, he wouldn’t stand a chance. Don’t let your grief make you forget that there’re still friends around among the living.”
Severus nodded slackly and stood up with a sigh, drying his tears while he walked around in the small room that was lit magically by a fair number of floating white light bulbs. Aberforth had conjured them so as to cheer him up. Neither of them really listened to the wireless that stood on the table. Severus studied his miserable reflection in a mirror on the wall. It was missing a shard. Just like him. Though only one. He wasn’t whole either, but he was missing far more than a single shard. The radio fell silent.
“I’ll get him for that one day, the bloody coward.”, said Aberforth.
“No. ’T’s no’ a crime ter run away when incapable o’ facin’ thin’s, an’ if it was yer own mistakes. Tha crime is ter carry on no’ differin’ o’ whom ye take. Tha crime is ter steal o’ those who dun’ ’ave anythin’, fer tha mere chance ter ge’ those who ’ave too much ter buy sum’ o’ tha’. ’Is crime is ’is blind greed. Tha’ ’e doesn’ do it fer survivin’ anymore, bu’ ter gain. Tha’s wha’ will – o fodder – ”
“Severus?”, he didn’t hear him much and he was panting heavily at the blood chilling sensation. “What’s – ”
“Sum’one’s – sum’one’s said ’is name – ”
And he knew who it had been this time, by the panic that erupted in his heart. More and more of this panic became his own and he whirled around, like being chased by aggressive birds, unable to control it, unable to hear Aberforth whom he barely saw getting onto his feet. But there was something else. Something was happening out there, something that was even further from his control. He was losing him, every few moments. He drifted off, as though he was sliding into quicksand, but getting hold of some branches above, he lost grip of just after. He could hardly breathe and some strange pressure was working on his face. Questions thundered his ears, questions he didn’t understand, but he knew some part of him to answer, far away.
Meanwhile Severus was leaning against the wall by the mirror, not feeling his own weight on his shoulder and Aberforth in a haze of dark fog, had closed up. He saw his hand moving towards his other shoulder, but didn’t feel that touch either. Whirls of colour and the feeling of being squeezed into some thin pipe. He had Disapparated, but not out of danger, that much Severus knew.
Darkness all around, the room he was actually standing in just visible by the dots of light dancing above, Aberforth reduced to a pair of flashing blue eyes that was rather close. It had never been that bad before. Perhaps it was due to the fact that he was fighting against thoughts that weren’t his.
Harry’s mind was mingling with another, the one on the other end yet seemingly unaware or ignorant of it. There was again a voice, but it was distant, as if he himself was buried under tons of water and the voice was shouting from the surface. In a blur, he saw Aberforth’s lips move, recognised them to say something, but not perceiving what it meant. There was one and the same movement in between, many times, and he considered it might have been his name.
Then there was something more, mixing into the chaos. Another one’s fear, crawling from his hand and his feet, up to his heart. Fear that was attempted to be locked out – and Severus knew where they had been brought, knew who Harry was facing now. There was this feeling he knew quite well. He had had it any time Draco had been wandering the castle, up to the Room of Requirement, anxious, hoping to not be caught – someone was forcing him to do what he didn’t want, but Draco was resisting.
Confusion twirled in. Harry’s confusion. Even if he had been able to move, he wanted to know what was going on. He concentrated purely on the scene that was happening far away. Aberforth’s eyes were gone. He had shut his own before him, so he could feel properly what kind of issue there was being discussed. It seemed they were meaning Draco to identify Harry, but he – refused. Vaguely, but he did. There was chance. There still was a chance, Severus knew. And then Harry was drifting into darkness, his thoughts sorting themselves. He was thinking. Severus did his best to shut away Draco’s emotions. That made his hand burn, but he ignored that heat that tried to melt it from the inside. What counted now, was Harry. Not Draco, not that hand that was squeezing his left upper arm, not – Luna?
Severus’ eyes shot open, momentarily blinded by the light bulbs that were still floating above their heads. In front, as soon as he could see better again, he found Aberforth to be standing, looking straight at him, the old face being a twisted mess of emotions as well. His lips moved, but Severus still didn’t hear a word that left them. That was where they had brought Luna!
He cursed himself. He cursed himself so badly for not having thought of that place. Now, it was so obvious that they would have brought her to the headquarters. The cellar was safe, it was enchanted to hide Lucius’ material secrets. The best prison, away from the official, and even safer as no Dementor would be tempted to attack.
In the moment he realised, something more moved in the corner of his eye and he turned his head for it. So did Aberforth, standing right before the mirror. Severus’ heart leapt. Utter despair was woven into the voice, but that did not matter now. All that mattered, was the sound – hearing that voice again, after so many months – having heard it last when Harry had meant to prevent the doe from walking away. It warmed his shaking body, made it stop trembling, no matter the fear in its depth – and tears stood once more in his eyes, tears of happiness, partly, and he ignored that knot in his throat, clinging to every syllable that came moaning from the mirror, regardless of the terror.
Aberforth let go. He saw him blinking, then turn backwards to lean to the wall himself. Harry was gone. From his view, but not from his heart, not from his head. He was still there. Not as strong as before though, but enough to know he was safe for the moment. He studied Aberforth, who seemed troubled, swamped by the whole situation. His head turned for him and their unlike eyes met. Something like a puzzle being set together, was going on behind these flashing blue eyes; as grand as what had happened when Remus had discovered Severus’ secret only hours ago; and revealing another similarity to the old man’s dead brother. Aberforth was figuring it out, putting piece by piece together, getting the clue, like Remus.
“That – that can’t be coincidence, can it?”, the old man whispered, but Severus was back to his own mind.
“Tha’s unimportan’ now.”, he said, confident again, and striking him with a single look.
“Fine, if you say so – DOBBY!”, Aberforth yelled into the room and with a loud crack the Elf suddenly was there, a little bustled. “Listen to me. You need to Apparate into the cellar of Malfoy Manor, please. Harry’s captured there. Get him out.”
“H-Harry P-Potter?”, Dobby muttered. “I will be there in a second!”, and with another of his ear trashing Apparating sounds, he went.
Some more moments they remained in silence, with dancing lights above, their hair shimmering. So much difference. Aberforth’s so light, his eyes so shining bright, while Severus’ were dark, and far younger – but either bore all the marks of their past. By the look on Aberforth’s face though, he understood that the man finally realised who had seen more in his life. Who had seen worse. And it made Severus sad, having to see the awareness, the guilt in those blue eyes. Much more than it had ever done so with his now dead older brother.
“I – I’m goin’ – jus’ in case.”, Severus said hastily then, but Aberforth’s hand on his shoulder once more, held him back. “Listen, if ’ey call tha Lor’ an’ Harry’s no’ there anymore,”
“No, Severus, you listen. I understand that you – er – really like that boy – but it’s dangerous what you’re doing.”
“No’ more dangerous than wha’ I did in September.”
“And what did you do in September?”
“Probably tha crazies’ thin’ I’d ever – ”, he slightly winced at the feeling, his breath sucked in without intention.
“What’s – ”
“She’s called ’im – ”
“What do you mean – ”
“Bellatrix – she’s called ’im – I – I need ter go – ”
“No, Severus – ”, but he wrenched himself free and shot upstairs before Aberforth could get hold of him another time.
The door above crashed open and once outside, he Apparated to the outskirts of the manor with a horrible pain that nearly made him fall from the sky. His heart was set on fire, burning in the flames of hell and as the hedges were getting closer and fearing they might catch fire by his mere closeness, he could just compose himself before he crashed into them. Some black whirls shot past above him, unaware of his presence.
Severus rushed up again, trying hard to lock out the agony that was infesting him, wanting no more than catching up with that fog that crossed the barrier before him. The front doors burst open, like Harry’s heart in that moment. But when Severus sat down himself, his feet meeting hard with the gravel, that pain transformed into the panic from minutes ago. Not meaning to be heard, he snuck through the lobby, over to the broad staircase. The fog was gone, upwards. Right when his left foot touched the lowest step, he nearly toppled over. That horrible feeling – he had had it too often himself, too often to bear – and he knew what must have happened. He saw nothing but red – and then green – green eyes, glistening like stars, far bigger than Harry’s, just in a split-second flash –
Half leaning on the stairs, fingers digging into the handrail and stones beneath, his own eyes were filling with tears another time. He fought them, knowing that this was not the moment for him to cry, knowing it by Draco’s feelings that hit him, by the voices from above, by the screams. And he literally took his feet in hand, set off again, flew upstairs, into the drawing room from where the voices came. He didn’t pay attention to what Voldemort was yelling. He stopped at the door only to see the skeletal hand and wand directed at Draco, who was unarmed, no way out against the window-side wall, his white face covered in thin rivulets of blood.
In the second the lipless mouth opened for yelling the incantation, there was a black and white rush from the corner, passing him with a speed the man had never before gained in his life and he leapt between, taking the full force of the curse, collapsing to his knees with a sickening cry of pain. Draco’s hand clapped on his own mouth, to cushion his cry as he had to watch his father being tortured instead, thick tears making the blood flow faster below his bluish grey eyes while his mother sunk behind an armchair, taking shelter when Voldemort spun for the next victim.
That was his chance. He flew over to his friend, in the blind angle of the eyes torn by rage and dragged him away across the floor, over to where Narcissa crouched. Bellatrix jumped aside with a terrific scream and the next curse hit the Werewolf, who was surprised by the force of it, unable to resist it either. His howling cries were enough to deaden Severus’ footsteps when he ran for Draco who had then sunken to the floor below a window.
“I’m – I’m fine – ”, he coughed quiet enough not to be heard by anyone but him over Bellatrix’s screaming now, his anxious eyes on his trembling father. “Just – the chandelier – ”
“Where is Hannah?”
“Hogwarts – sent her back – before – ”
“And – ”
“They’re gone – the three – and Griphook – Dobby came – ”
“I know. Harry called for help. Aberforth sent him.”, meanwhile, Narcissa tried to get Lucius to his feet and out of the hall through a door on the other side.
“I think he got Luna and Dean out first, and Olivander – Harry’s got my wand – and Bella’s – what?”
“Cue.”
“Cue?”
“Send a Patronus to Bill Weasley. He shall immediately take his parents and sister to their aunt Muriel. I’ll wake Ginevra then. She can get there via Floo. I connected my fireplace securely to all safe houses long ago and no one knows she hasn’t gone home yet.”
Draco hastily but careful not to give any sign, pointed Severus’ wand at the skirting board of the wall they sat at and hidden by Severus’ cloak, in the wonderful distraction of Greyback’s screaming when Voldemort couldn’t find any other without turning, the silver flash sped through. Two seconds later, he had his wand back and the tail of the otter disappeared likewise.
Severus used the rest of their granted timeframe to summon all shards from Draco’s face and hands, his cry unheard, and healed the wounds without much effort. It was then that Voldemort decided to spin around and point his wand at where he remembered Draco to have been. But as though Severus had sent an impulse to make him falter; what he hadn’t, at least not consciously; Voldemort staggered to halt from his own move, his eyes wide open with a flicker of real horror now, the anger seemingly swept away in no time.
Seeing him there, sitting by the boy, his guarding arms laid around him, did something to Voldemort he visibly didn’t understand himself. And then he lowered his wand, the panting of the others or the gazes of Draco’s parents by the back door ostensively locked from his mind.
“Where is – my wand – Draco – ”, Bellatrix croaked, never having been more shaken in her life, yet conscious enough to have noticed the loss.
“Gone – ”, he answered honestly without actually meaning to. “He – he took it – mine too – ”
It was that moment Severus had craved for not to happen. He saw some awareness flicker behind those snake-like eyes – where he had been before he had been summoned – what he had done – and he felt it confirmed by Harry, who didn’t know he just had provided that knowledge, circumventing the shield of mind in a pathetically easy way.
“Severus!”, he aspirated in his hissing voice, seeming unconscious, knocked out. “What a – fortunate – coincidence – I did not expect – here? You? Why, yes – of course – would – would you mind accompanying me? There is a place I need to go – quite urgently – I believe, you can bring me there – ”
“Of course, my Lord.”, he replied, as if untaken by the whole, shortly patted on Draco’s head and raised, gently and prepared.
There was one last string, one last hair until the fiddlestick would not be able to play anymore. One last hair and he had to give it all possible protection until Harry would manage to destroy the last Horcrux. He could not perceive how many there were left. The Hallows were too present in his son’s mind. But he had to obey, had to bring him a little closer to that fibre. That was the risk, the danger he had known he was sliding along all the time, and done it willingly.
A coin heated up in the pocket of his trousers when they left the manor flying together, just enough for him to feel it along with his comparatively light feet, above one of which gentle fingers seemed to be wrapped and he knew that Ginevra was safe, that her parents had escaped before any squadron could have caught them, or had not even been sent yet. And Tom Riddle seized his arm, not tight, but rather exhausted and he Disapparated to the hills above Hogsmeade, Severus forced to follow.
“Let us walk now.”, he didn’t like he idea, but on the other hand,
“Of course, my Lord.”
Just half a step behind, just enough to not be in view of the straight on focused red eyes, he walked along, the brand on his left forearm securing him from the much more powerful charm than which had cost Dedalus’ life in further consequence. Voldemort himself had placed it on the village, only active at nighttime and no threat to the patrols. One of those passed them, each shortly greeting, absent, but struck immediately then, pulled into reality with brute force of awareness, and the shock alone was enough to make them bow for their master. Severus could briefly see an autocratic smile pushing up the little flesh on Voldemort’s cheekbones. Enough time to grant him the chance to slip his hand in and out of his pocket for a scarlet feather.
From behind shut curtains of a single window, orange light shone onto the alley and in another he could see the reflection of the Death Eaters move around a corner and vanish. Whoever was up, didn’t matter. What mattered was the fortune of this person having lit the fire that covered the shine of he flame behind his back when the feather left with he message he had scribbled on his hand behind. When he retrieved his hands, he could just spot the horrible scrawl reading THEY ARE SAFE before it was gone by the acknowledgement of it.
The walk gave him some time to reflect, to compose, to just sort his thoughts, memories and emotions behind his usually present shield of mind and he studied the pale bald head as their feet travelled on, up the road to the castle. Whatever people said, the child was still in there and it had just peeked out as he had ordered him to cease flying. Meeting with a patrol was one thing that boy inside had been hoping for, relishing the childish satisfaction of power and Severus could already see him strutting through the castle, with the wand in hand, honestly grinning at terrified students, like a king on a parade; yet unaware that someone had intended to pee on that parade from the very beginning on.
A bumping light came towards them, the silent alarm of the charms having summoned him from his post. But not long in coming, a charm as silent hit him, turning him on the spot. Voldemort stopped before the gate.
“You seem to have extraordinary control over the magic guarding the school,”
“I am Headmaster. All control over the shields lies with me, my Lord. Easy to say, they cannot stop me from confunding a Squib.”
“Yes, that is easy to say, I believe you. Is it as easy to say however, that you need not open the gates to grant me entry?”
“As easy, my Lord.”
“Good. Bring me inside the shield.”
The grip returned to his arm and he flew him on, up along the secured bars, across the border, the ancient and new enchantments, the Dementors inside making way for them, and Voldemort took the lead again, settling down on a path at last, his bony fingers letting go. They once more walked alongside several yards far. Then he raised his hissing voice, as low as before.
“I shall join you in the castle shortly. Leave me now.”
Not in need of dropping any more words, he briefly bowed and stormed off, the solid ground under his feet never having felt better. Inhaling the clear early morning air, hearing the first birds’ songs, he walked on until he didn’t feel the stare anymore. The ground was gone once again and he shot up to the sleeping castle, invisible, faster than ever, high up in the air and towards the tower. The window opened and he knew he had only moments to deliver the message. Seriously snoring, the portraits were vast asleep. But there was not a second now to pity old paint.
“Albus!”, instantly, the old man jerked up from his sleep.
“What?”, he looked around, searching for whom had called, barely recognisable in the scarce light.
“Albus – ”, he repeated, visible then, “Be awake, quick – he knows – ”
“Knows?”, Dumbledore mumbled sleepy.
“That you had the Elder Wand. He is getting it right now!”
“Oh – my – ”
“He wants another word with me. I will wait for him at the front gates.”
“Here? You – you cannot let him inside the castle!”, unmistakably, he was awake now.
“I will have to, if he requests. Trust me. I have found his leak. I can keep him at bay down there. I just thought, you would want to know.”
There was no more time for additional information now and he flew back out through the window, down by the walls and into the Viaduct Courtyard. It seemed years ago that he had left before Kingsley and the others had arrived, left Tonks and her mother grieving over the loss Andromeda had felt for weeks already. A cat jumped aside in shock when he materialised from thin air and both realised in the same second whom they were facing.
“Get inside! Into your office!”, Severus hissed, dismissing the tickling in his nose. “Do as I say! Immediately!”
Right when the Animagus’ tail disappeared under the arches and he heard the door to a side corridor open and close, black fog sank down before him, a different wand in hand now, glee on the white face, and the sun shone her first rays onto the yard. There was a cloud on the horizon, not big. But exactly that cloud was it, that covered him in shadows. That cloud kept the light from falling onto Lord Voldemort, standing there, with the Elder Wand in hand, not knowing it would not serve him as expected. The grin faded to a smile that had not laid on that face ever before, and on his former only decades ago, too long in the past for Severus to have had the chance yet to see it.
“I understand you now.”, he solely whispered, not louder than the birds. “They shall not further be harmed. They had their punishment, their lesson. You may tell them they are free to leave their house, whenever they wish. Bring me inside, if you please. Into the Great Hall.”
It was that moment, he had been longing for, for nearly twenty years. And now that it had arrived, he could do nothing but turn, walk up the few broad stairs and let the oaken front gates open for them. The Entrance Hall was empty, silent, peaceful. So was the other, bigger, and glistening in the shine that fell through the high windows, topped by the clear, soft blue sky that reflected in the enchantment. Much to his surprise, the man behind him stopped in mid walk and he looked back, finding him lingering, truthfully dwelling in the scenery they had entered.
Not losing his smile, he walked on, to the left. Only Severus’ eyes watched him stride along the Slytherin table, between benches and wall, until he reached the middle. There he climbed over the bench and sat down, his look travelling through the hall for a while. Their eyes met and he gave Severus a simple nod, signalling him that he wished for company. Slightly taken aback by the oddity for a moment, he decided to walk as well, rather than fly, and paced between the benches, up to where he sat. A second nod, and he climbed across the other bench, sat down opposite to him.
“I know it is early,”, he spoke unusually soft, “But it would be wonderful to have breakfast. Just you and I, my most loyal one, you, that you understand me; and myself.”
It was indeed striking to hear him mentioning himself after someone else in a sentence. Simply aghast but not showing, Severus knocked three firm times onto the table and they did not stir by the sound, however, shortly, by the unexpectedly high gasp of the Elf that quickly tucked his locket under his unworthy clothing, though of his age, being still quick-witted.
“Oh what an honour it is,”, he bowed as if he had been waiting for him to come all night then, “To have the Dark Lord himself here between these ancient walls. How may Kreacher serve the Lord?”
“You know what I prefer for breakfast.”
“Of course, Kreacher does.”, Kreacher bowed again, with this rare smile of his that was not real, but only one who cared for him would be able to differ. “And for you, Headmaster, the same as usual?”
“Yes, thank you. But slightly reduced. I had a rather abounding dinner.”, and no sleep, he wanted to add, but bit it back down when the Elf was gone from the table already, leaving a hint of footprints on the shining dark wood.
Then, in that hut in southern Ukraine, he had not even slightly dared to imagine that he might one day, sit there, in the glistening early morning sun, at the Slytherin table, with Tom Marvolo Riddle, who was more commonly known by the name Lord Voldemort; but that one had politely waited outside for him to return; and order breakfast from a Houseelf that had hidden the only visible proof that this man was dying, just in time for him to not notice it. Not believing it could have happened; but there was something that surprised him even more: a steaming cup of milk appeared next to where he had carefully put down this said-to-be most powerful wand of all, and between his cloak-covered bony arms, a plate with bacon and eggs and a spoonful of currant jam on the edge, and a basket with some baked toast. It however amused him to see his opponent lift that area where should have been his right eyebrow, but was no hair anymore.
“That is a rather unusual breakfast, you have there, Severus.”
“Well, what can I say,”, he not only inwardly smiled with sudden satisfaction, “I was told to be unusual, not only once.”
“Indeed. However. Enjoy your breakfast.”
“I will, my Lord. So may you.”
And for the first time in this man’s life, these two words left his now lipless mouth, with pure honesty.
“Thank you.”
~~#~~