Many came late for breakfast on the following Saturday morning. So did Harry and Ron, even after the owls had brought the mail. Naturally, Hermione had already read through Ron’s Prophet and was now working on several papers, needing quite a large area to her sides and therefore sitting rather abandoned in between Ginny and Parvati.
“Where have you been?”, the two boys were greeted harshly as they sat down opposite to her, who didn’t look up from a parchment she was scribbling on.
“Good morning, Mum!”, Ron frowned at her and gave his sister a questioning look as well, when that one snickered into her toast. “What’s this rubbish?”
“I have been taking this subject for three years, Ronald,”, she sighed but still didn’t spare him a look, “And you still ask me the same question, every day, every hour, every minute and every time you see me working on it.”
“It’s Arithmancy, Ron.”, Harry whispered to him with an ironic smirk.
“Well, wonderful, Harry.”, Hermione sang. “At least you have grown some brains.”
“Blimey, Hermione!”, Ron gasped.
Harry could absolutely understand her mood. They hadn’t told Ron anything about last Thursday evening and they never would.
“So? What’s in the Prophet, Hermione?”, asked Ron and scanned the first page absentmindedly, more focused on the bacon he reached for.
“A tragic event occurred last night.”
“Really?”, his eyes were glued to the paper at once.
“Mr Ronald Weasley has lost his ability to read.”, she pouted and Ron huffed at her.
“Had ourselves some Essence of Snape for breakfast, or what?”, chuckled Ron and Ginny grunted onto her toast with a crunch, resulting in her nose being dug deep into the jam, though she didn’t miss the split-second angry glance Hermione gave her from the corner of her eye.
“You cannot gain an `Essence´ of a person, Ron. No matter what Patrick Süskind wrote.”
“Who?”
“Oh pardon me, it slipped me for a second that you can’t read.”
“That’s a Muggle author, Ron.”, Ginny snickered again when leaning over to him, the jam gone. “And she’s been reading his books for three years now.”
“And he wrote that one can gain the `essence´ of a person? Sounds a little bit perverted, doesn’t it?”, chuckled Ron.
“It would include killing.”, Hermione said cold. “And no, I didn’t kill Snape.”
“Didn’t you? Not even figuratively?”, Ginny chuckled under her breath, but Hermione pretended not to hear her.
“Hang on! She’s probably right! He’s still alive!”, both Harry and Ginny turned their heads towards the open golden doors. “Didn’t he say, he won’t be here?”
“He said nothing about his reason for changing that one detention to an earlier date.”, it was Hermione again. “And maybe it reaches some barely important part up there in your head, he probably wants to have something in his stomach before he leaves or does whatever he does today.”
“Looks more like he wants you in his stomach – ”, Ron swallowed.
“I am not a cannibal, Mr Weasley.”, Hermione’s eyes; still on her notes; gaped with shock – but not for the reason the people around her looked up to the man who had stopped exactly behind her.
“Sacred blancmange powder – ”, she gasped. “No – no, no, no – ”, her fingers searched over some papers in the near with panic, “No, no, no, no, no! But that can’t be – no – shit – ”
“Mind your language, Miss Granger.”
“Oh shut up – no! This is not supposed to – ”
“I beg your par-?”, he snarled, but she heavily waved her free hand to somewhat shush him.
“No, no, no!”, Hermione moaned, ignoring the fact that he got out his glasses and frowned over her right shoulder.
“At least you got that here right.”
“What?”, her head rushed to the side and nearly crashed into his.
“But this one’s a whole load of kibosh.”, he curled his lips and straightened.
The fascinated stares of everyone around on him, he lively took off his cloak, which simply shrunk to the size of a walnut in his hand. Amazed gazes followed it slip into the pocket he had taken the glasses from. Then he swung his legs over the bench, sat down in the gap between her and Ginny and snatched the pencil from Hermione’s hand. She too watched him trail his fingers over some of the papers on the table, almost all of them filled with numbers and peculiar signs. Tapping every here and there and dropping the one and other nod, sigh or even snort, he finally took a deep breath, still surrounded by disbelieving stares and Harry’s interestedly narrowed brows.
“This looks more like it should be fifty-seven.”
“Um – ”, he took her left hand and lifted it.
“Oh yes, forty-two is far off the target. May I?”, he now pointed on the paper with her hand.
“Of course, Sir.”, Hermione swallowed as he picked the paper and placed it to his right.
“Are you sure, you copied down the Ansuz Function?”
“I – oh my god!”, she gargled with a moan. “Oh no! I totally forgot about that!”
“’En tha’s tha bigges’ sgudal ye could’ve wasted yer time wit’.”, he muttered, and although everyone around frowned, Seamus appeared to be the only amused next to Ernie who; having turned about along with some fellow Hufflepuffs; snickered into his hand.
“No!”, Hermione whimpered, ignoring Parvati’s demanding look to obviously figure out what had happened to their teacher’s usual correct speech; Ron meanwhile had his face in a terrible grimace and Harry couldn’t help grinning, in spite of the troubled glistening in his eyes.
“It is no’ tha’ tragic.”
“It is!”
“No, it’s worse. ’Cause tha’ makes ev’ry single thin’ on ’ere, ’ere an’ ’ere useless.”, he took three seemingly random sheets, screwed them up and carelessly threw them over his shoulder. “An’ tha’ ’s well.”, a fourth parchment flew to the middle corridor. “Is ’ere still anythin’ I could write on?”
“Yes, Professor.”, the girl hastily reached into her bag and pulled out a new sheet.
“Thank ye. Now ’en, gimme a minute an’ ye’ll feel tha need ter kiss me, Miss Granger.”
His tone was absolutely serious, but Hermione blushed at an instant and Ginny played with her hair, avoiding any looks with widely opened eyes to the enchanted ceiling. Ron’s mouths stood as ajar and Harry mirrored Ernie, only with his elbows on he table, but he didn’t care. His own eyes and the fingers of his left hand flicked over lines, numbers, signs and runes, while his right hand wrote down calculations that looked like the most complicated and confusing thing on earth. Not for him and Hermione though. Her expression soon resembled Ron’s and her mouth fell open too.
“You’re – doing it – backwards? Sir?”
“It is way easier.”, he had regained his abili– will – to speak proper English. “You only have to bring the pre-numeral signs in order.”
“The opposite?”
“Exactly. Well, almost. There are some exceptions, but if you figured them out,”
“But we never – Professor Vector – ”
“Is a good teacher, but only human. And that here is the most incredible nonsense I have ever seen in such a calculation.”, he murmured and pointed on a term to his left. “Nor can you use an indefinite integral for this. And those terms are incoherent.”
“No, they’re not.”
“Believe me, Miss Granger, they are.”
“But she said that is legitimate – ”
“Did she?”, now he was visibly upset.
“Yes.”
“Still?”
“Still?”, repeated Hermione.
“Never mind.”, Severus puffed and – winced at the voice behind him.
“Oho! What do I see here?”
The way his fingers caressed the pencil wouldn’t have made anyone want to be in position of the tool. Nevertheless he put on a light fake smile and slowly turned his head up, past the big belly, looking over his glasses, much like Dumbledore had done when having had a sedate chat with Madam Maxime.
“A very good morning, Horace. How was your night?”
“Dreadful.”, Slughorn sighed.
“Oh really?”, the sarcasm was as unobvious as a fully grown Chinese Fireball midst hundreds of green geckos.
“Yes. Someone broke into my office.”
“How tragic!”, Harry and Ron exchanged quite clear looks on his poofy tone. “Let me guess – they stole all your wine.”
“How do you know, Severus? Always a nose for such, right?”, he chuckled very pathetically. “Oh students these days – no scruples, no. Well, fortunately they didn’t find the Scotch. So, helping Miss Granger with Arithmancy? You must know,”, Slughorn now addressed Harry and Ron, probably due to the mere fact that they stared up at him, “Dear Severus here had brilliant marks in all his O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s, you see?”
“I found the average rather boring, if you ask me.”, Severus snorted. “Though if national laziness and more important matters hadn’t crossed my way, I would have gone for the whole lot, solely for the mere sake of it.”
“Ah probably. But Outstanding in all eleven O.W.L.s and the nine N.E.W.T.s you took, had indeed been nastily exhausting for your colleagues to witness, right?”, this chuckle of his was a little more lively, and the gulps, breaths and quiet gasps all around were hard to miss.
“Oh yes. I frig myself to sleep every night with the highly pleasuring memory of Unicorn’s tears when he saw me standing up there, receiving certificate after certificate.”, Harry didn’t need his eyes flicking at him for a split second to know whom he meant.
“And this – absolutely touching Thesis – ”, Slughorn didn’t seem to have heard him in his debauchery.
“Now, if you are done with swanking, I would be very grateful if you let me continue working here. I am hungry and want to get this over with as soon as possible.”
He though regretted the add. Hermione had snatched a toast with ham from Harry’s plate he had just put there and held it right under Severus’ nose.
“Hermione!”, the bereft moaned.
“Put that down, Miss Granger. I do not eat poisonous things.”, he murmured and looked back up to Slughorn, whereupon Hermione ate the toast in one go.
“Hermione!”
“You are still here, Horace?”
“Well, I wanted – to say – something – ”, he dreamily gazed at Harry. “Harry m’boy,”
“I am sure, we all can live without that. And keep your graspers at bay, or you might just find a hand pouring your precious little Scotch over your precious little shelf and give it a spark.”, Severus snarled through his teeth.
Slughorn froze, only his eyes on him now. The other teacher however gave the paper between his hands a glance, finished a term, underlined the result and lazily held the sheet up in front of Hermione’s nose as though it was covered in some disgusting slime. As fast as his eyes; still surrounded by the same expression; were back up on Slughorn, Hermione tore it from his two fingers and stared at it.
“What? Fifty- fifty-seven – ”, she aspirated fascinated when he put down the pencil, still not breaking eye contact with a now heavily blinking Slughorn. “That – can I kiss you now?”, it blustered out of her; Harry, Ron, Ginny, Neville, Seamus and Parvati choked at once.
Menacing silence, all around, everyone’s looks on her. And that for approximately a year.
“I don’t know whether you can, but if you want to die, Miss Granger, then of course.”, he moaned at her.
“I want to die – ”, she added hollow.
“Cor blimey! I mean’ tha’ lit’rall-”, his voice broke off in mid-murmur when he had spotted something. “Wha’s – “, totally dumbfounded, he gazed and breathed at a paper that was still under her hands. “Oh me – ’is – ’is migh’ work!”, he yanked it from her. “Well blow me! It migh’ actually work! Incredible! Ye ’ave – tha basis ’ere – I’ve been searchin’ fer two years until I le’ it – ”, he took another deep breath and returned to scribbling for about a minute on the empty side of the sheet he had easily won back from her; Harry suddenly felt himself reminded of a certain theoretical O.W.L. he had witnessed through a memory.
None of the students had ever seen him running like that; or even running at all; and most of his former teachers had forgotten that he could. But within a few seconds he was up at the staff table with both his scribbling as well as Hermione’s paper as evidence, pulled Septima Vector’s plate with pie from between her hands and slammed the sheets onto the space instead, earning an alarmingly confused look from everyone in the hall. When she picked up the papers, he sat down sideways on the edge of the table in front of her and looked at the plate he held up with greatly confident boredom.
“Call me a rich man, Septima.”, he sighed and examined the pie with a then slightly pondering smirk.
“Severus – what – is – this?”, with another sigh he helped himself to a clean fork and big bite with enormously childish relish.
“Abble bie.”
“Excuse me?”
“Abble bie.”, he repeated. “An’ an absholud’ly delish’s one.”
“Severus! You can’t just slam parchment under my nose and confiscate my breakfast pie!”, he swallowed it down.
“As a matter of fact, I can. And survive it, since it’s yours.”, a second bite went down his throat as he continued studying the remaining pie. “Now that we sorted that out, would you please be so kind and give me my five hundred Galleons?”
“Five – hundred? What are you talking about?”, the woman moaned.
“Read.”, was his long murmur in return and he went for the second piece.
“What?”, she finally looked onto the calculations. “But – what? Severus – no! This – this can’t be!”
“Five hundred.”
“Severus!”
“That was the deal.”, he even ate the half eaten piece. “Don’t make bets with students if you cannot cash in. I am slightly disappointed to admit that it has taken me twenty two years and some help to achieve it, but you neither set a time limit nor any other conditions at all, if I remember well – and I do remember well. So,”, he exchanged the sheets and the plate once more, “Thank you for the apple pie – I see it as a deposit – and try to give me the money as quick as possible. I have no idea when or whether you will get your next salary.”
“Excuse me?”
“Exactly. I need to frame those in gold now.”, with the sheets in hand again, he slid off the table and walked back to Hermione, flabbergasted faces following him. “You are still here?”, he had come to halt in the somewhat corner between her and Slughorn, folded the two papers and put them into his pocket along with his reading specs. “If you stepped into a puddle of glue, you only need to say. I can make you move again in no time. People say I have a rather firm foot.”
“I – er – well – ”, Slughorn just stammered.
“But apparently it is your words that have been glued to the insides of your brain. Well,”, Severus leaned over the table, took some baked whole wheat toast and wrapped it into a napkin, “Never mind.”, and walked off.
“Where are you going, Severus?”, Slughorn wasn’t the only one to frown after him.
“Feeding crows.”, he just sang back and gave him an absent wave with the toast, but without turning.
“Why don’t you take some biscuits with you too.”, Harry grumbled under his breath.
“He’s – ”, Ron aspirated, “Drunk!”
“No, he isn’t.”, Hermione sighed. “He’s just – triumphant – ”
“I know what he’s like when he’s triumphant and that’s not it! He’s definitely sloshed! Didn’t you hear his sarcasm? I bet, he stole the wine!”, Slughorn heard that.
“You – pardon?”, the teacher shortly looked at him and then again after his colleague who strutted towards the doors. “Severus?”, he called out. “Did you steal my wine?”
“The sound of it splashing into the toilet was like a choir of angels singing for me alone!”
“Severus!”, Slughorn bellowed and waved. “You can’t – that is not what – hey!”, he had disappeared up the marble staircase. “I am not done with you, you – you mad clod!”, several people in the hall snorted into whatever was just in front of them. “Mad, you are! Simply mad! Merlin’s beard!”, the round man shook his head, brandishing his hand wildly.
“And how I agree with you, Sir.”, Ron chuckled.
“Thank you, Wesley.”, he sighed and dropped his shoulders, then turned and shuffled up to the staff table, muttering to himself.
“Down the toilet – as if!”, continued Ron. “And it’s Weas– ”
“Quite probably.”, Hermione corrected him.
“What?”, said he and Harry together.
“He doesn’t drink alcohol. Not a teensy little bit at all.”
“And how come you know something like that again?”, Harry asked. “Has he accidentally dropped his diary in the library or what?”
“As I said, I do it the Moody-way. I simply pay attention.”, she piled up the papers with a mere flick of her wand, shoved them into her bag and stormed off upstairs.
“Bloody hell!”, moaned Ron. “They’re both going nutty!”
~~#~~
Surrounded by ruffled black feathers and crumbs of toast, she found him where she had expected him. Though he only stared through between the bars of the parapet farther before him, out into the blue, his hands on the low wooden platform he sat on. It took her some seconds to see that he actually smiled. His smile was so faint, so fragile that Hermione feared, every move of her could kill it. So she carefully wiped away some crumbs and feathers to his right and sat down, dropping her bag behind her.
“I – ”, she began, “I thought, you might want a proper breakfast. So I went to the kitchen and – ”, cautiously she placed the filled plate with cutlery on his thighs, her left hand on his shoulder.
“You are sweet. Thank you.”, it eased her to see a grown, gentle smile presented to her.
“May I k– ”, but her question was already answered by his tender, soft lips on hers, though they were pulled away the moment she wanted to return the kiss.
“No.”, he still smiled and adjusted the collar of her blue and pink chequered blouse as well as some strands at her forehead that had loosened from her plait. “You may not.”
“Idiot.” chuckled Hermione. “What kind of bet was that?”
“Just a stupid little bet to prove something seemingly impossible. Pity that she never expected me to win it. But this way it was much more fun to see her face. And, I insist on my prize.”
“Five hundred Galleons? Really?”
“Oh yes. Her fault. She put up that number.”, Severus sang and started eating. “And to be honest, I am glad I didn’t figure it twenty years ago, but now.”
“Can I ask you something?”, Hermione spoke after some seconds of silence.
“You know you can.”, he said softly.
“What do you feel when you’re up here?”
The silence continued. Eating a little slower, he looked ahead again. Hermione knew she shouldn’t have asked. As a kind of remedy, she leaned her head against his shoulder and held onto his upper arm, her left arm around his waist, though trying not to limit his mobility.
“It is a good place to breathe.”, Severus whispered after long minutes of listening to the quiet breeze. “I wouldn’t say that it makes me happy to be up here, but it helps me clearing my mind without feeling locked in or lost in a wide, open world. It is a mix between, I think. Something neutral, somewhat different to other places on the grounds. I look out into the wide hills and mountains around or the loch, or even the far away stars on the night sky, but I don’t fall into it all. The tower is guarding enough to keep me – on the ground, if you understand what I mean. It is hard to explain.”
“And what would you say, the things you experienced up here – the memories connected to that tower – are they more positive or negative? Or really so balanced as you say?”
“Rather balanced, if I consider thoroughly, but a little more positive, yes.”, Hermione nodded.
“So it’s a good place.”
“I suppose,”
“Luna comes up here very often as well.”
“I know. We bump into one another, every now and then.”
“So you talk?”
“No.”
“No?”
“Not a single word.”
“Not even greeting?”
“Good thought. But no, not even greeting. It’s – how shall I say – not necessary – normally, she leaves when I come or the other way round.”
“Normally?”
“Sometimes she stays.”
“Just so?”
“Just so. As talkative as she may be in the right situations, as quiet she is, when every single word would be too much. A bit like Lily, if I think about it. She also had the right words or act for any situation, no matter if wise or the worst insult – or the right silence; she always knew. Well, at least ever since Sirius had failed to attack me with a pile of books in our third year; I blocked them all off, if it interests you.“
“What did she say?”
“`Don’t be so mean to the books, Sirius. Their content isn’t horrible enough that they deserve being thrown onto the floor.´”, Hermione couldn’t help giggling. “She then summoned one from his bag in which he carried loads of loose notes, held it up as if she wanted to drop it and said, `What would you say if I let that one kiss the ground?´ He replied that she wouldn’t dare. Of course she didn’t that time, but she said that she wouldn’t because she had a lot more sense for values and Banished it back into his bag.”
“But – Banishing comes in the fourth – ”
“Hermione.”, Severus gave her a warm laugh. “You say.”
“Yeah. Me.”, she went in. “What was that with the `Thesis´? I’ve heard some seventh-years talk about it and asked McGonagall, but she said I would get to know soon enough. I fear, I won’t.”
“If you insist, the Thesis is written in addition to your N.E.W.T. exams, not exactly correlating with them, but developed in respect of the learnt. Hardly anyone does it due to the factitious hassle with the exams. It has to be a handwritten book of at least three inches thickness, of pure text, text size around half an inch. A thorough research with proper listing of sources.”
“Whow.”
“But you have the entire year to finish it. They act like it is some very top secret, only telling the N.E.W.T. students about it. The presentation takes place a week after the End-of-Term-Feast along with giving out N.E.W.T. certificates and is exclusively for the graduated and their families, as well as high Ministry Officials.”
“I guess, it has to have a title?”
“Yes.”
“What did you call yours?”
“`Don’t just smile´.”
“What?”, chuckled Hermione. “And what was that about?”
“The origin and strength of happiness regarding the capability of a mind and its influence on the Patronus Charm.”
“Oh! Well, nice topic.”
“And fun to see everyone’s faces; for example when I gave plenty of evidence that some highly established books and opinions were simply wrong.”
“I can tell. Who else wrote a Thesis in your year? Lily, I guess?”
“Yes, Lily, Remus and Madeline Kendall from Ravenclaw.”
“Remus too? What did they write?”
“Madeline analysed the development of spell creation over the last ten centuries, Lily encouraged Remus to do an outing as Werewolf, providing facts rather than theories written by people who had no personal experience and she herself focused on the meaning of descent in the then current society and war, pointing out her own.”
“A Werewolf and a Muggle-Born speaking openly in front of people at that time? With the possibility of Death Eaters among the present? That’s tough.”
“That was Lily.”
“I wish I’d met – ”
Hermione sighed but was eventually stopped by a flame that erupted in midair, too stunned by it to hear that someone climbed the tower. Severus picked the paper before it could land on the floor and read it with interest.
“That is for you.”, he frowned.
“Me?”, frowned Hermione as well and snatched it from his hand.
“Yes. He wants to see you right now.”
“Seems so. But why – ”, she aspirated, flipping the paper several times in hope to find more.
“No idea. Though you’d better go. If he contacts someone this way, it is very urgent. Come.”
“It clearly says, he wants to see me alone. I don’t think,”
“I won’t let you go alone. If he has something to tell you, he can tell me as well. Come on.”, Severus raised easily though of the plate in his left hand and then pulled up Hermione with the right.
“And your breakfast?”
“It will survive the flight.”, he winked with a smirk. “Shall he stop me from ea–”, his smile froze at a specific sight and Hermione rushed around.
“What’s she doing here?”, Draco Malfoy said hollow, his eyes were red and swollen, obviously from crying.
“Well, what are you doing here?”, Hermione snapped back, ignoring his condition.
“I assume, that means that you will have to face him on your own, Miss Granger.”, she spun again, looking up to Severus. “Thank you for the effort on the breakfast.”
“Any time, Professor.”, she sighed and stomped past the boy, almost knocking him over.
“Granger – ”, he halted her, but she didn’t turn this time.
“What.”, she hissed with her back on him.
“I – I’m sorry – I didn’t mean to – ”
“Didn’t mean to what.”
“You know – ”
“Oh forget it, Malfoy.”
“No – I – ”
“I said, forget it.”, Hermione grunted and went downstairs.
~~#~~
Much to her surprise, the shutters in front of the windows were closed, which covered the huge office in such darkness, she needed some seconds to see anything. Quiet and listening, she closed the door behind. The only sound she could hear was Fawkes’ calm breathing, barely audible. Trying hard to see in the little light coming through the very thin slits of the shutters, she staggered further into the office and noticed that every single portrait on the walls was empty. He had sent them away again. That worried her slightly.
Suddenly, a light went on somewhere behind the high, throne-like chair. She searched her way around the desk and was momentarily blinded by the small but bright bluish shine from a wand. He sat on a cushioned bench in a lower alcove, a shimmering flat bowl floating in front of him. Hesitantly, Hermione walked down to him and sat herself to his left, her blinking eyes on the Pensieve for some moments. Then she looked at him and startled. The old man’s face appeared older than ever. First she blamed it on the light, but then she saw that he had become alarmingly thinner. His right hand was completely piceous now and the skin on the right side of his mandible, although covered by his beard, was visibly darker.
“How far – ”, she whispered, her eyes on his neck.
He understood and opened some buttons under his massive beard with his free hand, then lightly pushed the robe over the shoulder and held the silver bundles aside so she could get a better view. The dark colouring already entirely covered his right shoulder and collarbone as well as half of his neck. Hermione swallowed and curled her lips when he restored his clothing.
“You might wonder, why we sit in the dark, Miss Granger.”
“In fact, I do.”
“My skin has become sensitive to sunlight. It hurts if exposed to its rays.”
“When I wanted to leave the Astronomy Tower, he just came up. He’d cried. Do you know how he believes to kill you this time?”, Dumbledore lightly shook his head. “Do you think, he will make it? Before the whole plan goes awry?”
“I honestly don’t know, but he rather should, not?”, sighed the Headmaster. “Though Severus is better informed on the matter. I left it to him. You might want to ask him on details.”
“Then we’ll both leave it to him.”
“So quickly not interested anymore?”, he straightened a bit.
“Draco Malfoy is probably the only topic we skip, for entertainment purpose.”
“I can understand.”, Dumbledore nodded slackly. “Not the most delightful subject for a couple that isn’t granted nearly as much time together as they would desire to share.”
“What do you know about our relationship, Sir.”, huffed Hermione. “Apart from the box you presented us with.”
“Oh I see a lot more than you might catch me doing.”
“Apparently. Like you saw from the beginning how much Severus hates Harry. So very much that he would give his life for his son’s safety.”
“Ah, I am ashamed to admit, sometimes even I am not perfect.”, she could only snort on that. “A little too often, recently.”, he added and earned another snort. “Fine, not only recently. You are indeed a persistent young woman. I fear, I cannot break your will to keep the secrets Severus may have entrusted you with?”
“Not at all, Professor.”
“And he seems to have succeeded at training you in Occlumency.”
“I suppose, it’s a lot more help if you truly love your teacher, rather than detesting him on his own account.”
“That is something I can still not understand. It would have been so much easier for Harry. Yes, I can recall having told Minerva myself all those years ago when we left him in the care of his aunt and uncle, that it would be horror for him to grow up in a world where he is known by each and everyone, but still – ”
“Then I think, I should at least tell you one thing Severus explained to me. Security makes Harry careless and blind. He tends to have a blind trust, as well as blind hate. That is something I figured out myself over the past years, yes, but Severus confirmed that Harry actually inherited it from both his parents, who shared that weakness. Knowing that she was going to die, Lily made Severus swear that he would never reveal his true relation to Harry for the sake of his safety, until Severus himself would find someone he knew he could trust as much as he trusted her. And speaking about it, that is all I will tell you, Sir. I gave him my word and I have no intentions to break it any further. Besides, his behaviour did benefit your plans in the end, as I understand.”
“Indeed, yes. Very well, Miss Granger, I accept, that you want to protect him, but you are aware that I have not much time left and would like to understand him a little better before I – ah – will be pushing up the daisies.”
“If he doesn’t want to be understood, you don’t stand a chance, Professor.”
“Yes, he has always carried his obstinacy through.”, sang Dumbledore melancholic. “But you are right; the reason why I called for you is because I would like to show you something. You see, the man you love has never really been a saint and I do not wish you to make the mistakes I made in my youth.”
“I know quite well that he isn’t a saint.”, Hermione spat. “I know he’s a killer, and probably really good at it with more than just mice, but if you think I’d stop me from loving him, you are wrong. Love doesn’t ask. As much as I don’t ask anymore why he loves me or what he sees in me. I don’t care anymore. I love him, he knows it and it makes him happy. That is all that counts for me. If you wish to shatter any image you think I might have of him, I’m sorry for you. There is a reason why we live at a certain time and why we see and hear what we see and hear. I respect time. I have learnt to respect the privacy he keeps on his past, so should you, Sir. And for Heaven’s sake, stop, picking, on my mind! It hurts!”
Dumbledore visibly shrunk by the fierce demonstration of her adamant will. But she was enraged enough to simply not bother that she had just managed to scare one of the considered greatest wizards of all time or verbally attacked a dying man. Gritting her teeth behind her now firmly shut lips, she browbeat him.
“Nevertheless you should see the insanity with what he gained his practical Defence Against the Dark Arts N.E.W.T.”, Dumbledore said so calm that Hermione finally understood how much Harry had wished to just knock him over for such ignorance. “This,”, he took a flask from his pocket and held it up in the blue shine of his wand, “Is probably one of the biggest twists in Severus’ life and assumingly the first time someone has performed Dark Magic in a Defence exam. It is, I believe, a part reason why Voldemort wanted him in his innermost circle. I have never seen anyone lose control in such a controlled manner before and ever after.”, Hermione couldn’t deny he had destroyed the safety capsule around her curiosity with this, but her expression remained cold.
“Lulling me with knowledge so I will blow the whistle against him in return? Dream on, Dumbledore.”
“Miss Granger,”
“I know that he is way more powerful than he dares to admit. You should envy his modesty.”
“Ah if Severus is one thing not, then it is being modest. He loves to showcase his talents. Or so he did, at least until he graduated. He was utterly up himself, a vice he and poor James Potter shared alike. Two arrogant braggarts that lost almost no opportunity to taunt one another, not only a few times getting – ah – rough.”
“Quite understandable, considering that James loathed him the moment he caught sight of him, just because he fancied Severus’ best friend at first glimpse.”
“This might indeed have been one of the sparks – ”
“It was the spark. James was jealous and Severus protective. I don’t want to know what James saw in Lily, but I know what Severus feels for her. Quite frankly, I don’t believe you will ever be able to understand his motives unless you really looked into his eyes.”, Hermione was on her feet. “If you in fact care for Severus Snape, you should accept him the way he is. Because I accept that Lily Evans was, is, and will always be the love of his life. If you fail to understand that I love him enough to go through hell and back for him, no matter whether he now loves me as much or not or at all, then I’d like to express my condolences, Sir. May your life have a far quicker end than the grief he will carry around forever.”
She pulled her own wand, lit it with a flick and stomped back up the few stairs and around the desk just when the office door burst open. Within a split second, his eyes found her, worried at the sight of her outraged face and movement.
“What did he do.”, Severus snarled past her, as though he looked through the chair, down to the other light.
“Not he. I am done with that baby. Come on.”, she seized his wrist and pulled him back out. “Get me horizontal, or I will be the one to kill him.”
~~#~~
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